This is probably the daily question for many people around the world, especially those of us who are writing about very personal issues! My private blog gets a real blast, where there is no holding back, no worrying about offending others, or being told my feelings are wrong, or being told off, as some bleaders (Julie Powell’s term for blog followers) are prone to do.
My goodness, it would not be funny if someone hacked this site though… although it would probably make for interesting reading!! Some things will eventually get published, here or if I ever find the energy, in a book, but not until certain other events take place. A persons interpretation or memory of past events is merely that, and writing publicly about them is always fraught with danger.
When I read some of the blogs written by carers of people with dementia, I regularly feel sick and distressed for their loved ones; I always initially think how much I would really hate someone to write about how difficult I am, about how hard it is to cope with the changes in me. But then, on deeper reflection, I realise it is their form of therapy in the same way writing is for me. Also, their blogs reach out to other carers, providing support and comfort for each other during such a challenging time. The goal to be respectful of another person when writing about them is paramount for me; maybe I haven’t always achieved that, but I do try.
My memoirs are coming along, but maybe they will only ever be read by me and my husband and two sons. I cannot remember all events in my past, so am writing about the ones I can recall. Obviously they can help me write about some of the things we have shared over the last 20 years, but not all. Even parents have lots of ‘secrets’ about their own lives they do not share with their children. Maybe as my children are getting older (soon to be 23 and 24) I will share some of these things, as having an ‘adult – adult’ relationship with them is really important to me. Many parents continue to admonish or tell their children what to do and how to do it, no matter what age they are, and I see this as unhelpful to adult children, and divisive in relationships.
Posting this rambling blog today is all I have, and no time later today or tonight to edit, review or fix it, or work on another draft, or a new one!
To blog, or not to blog… well, for me that is simply not an option!