For Dementia Awareness Month Day 7, I have been attending a Research Forum, with no time for writing and blogging, or even finishing off one of my draft blogs, but this image and quote, from alzheimers.net says it all for me today.
If you are a care partner for someone with dementia, and feeling jaded, over stretched, sad, or burdened, please try to remember what it is like on our side of the fence.
Your partner with dementia still loves you.
Please, try to remember their love for you.
We [they] do not mean to be a burden to you.
We are living with a terminal illness, that is stealing our capacity and functioning. It is definitely not fun for us either, and having dementia is not our fault.
We are still deeply in love with our care partner, but we are trapped inside our own body, often unable to explain to you what we want, how we feel, what we would like to do, and we feel devastated that you, our care partner, have to stand there watching us lose things like our smile, our muscle function, our speech, and our ability to swallow. We see how you react, watching the changes, we see it slowly ripping your heart out. It rips our heart out too.
We do know how much our care partners have to do for us, and many of us feel guilty that it has to be so.
We are dying from a progressive terminal illness, and have to live with that in the best way we can as well, which is not always pretty; it is tough on you, and it is tough on us.
Even when we can no longer tell you, we love you.