Quora is a site I follow, and when I have time, also read the occasional article there if it is topical or seems interesting. However, since being lied about by people (no, not ‘close friends and family’ as they claimed to be) who I believe to be narcissists, I’ve been taking more notice of the articles on Quora about narcissists. This one, Who is more likely to become the narcissist, the golden or the scapegoat child? is interesting, and I have always believed the quote at the end of this article.
“Unless you process your shit, you carry it to the end, and somehow I figured that out at a very young age. Of course all these years later I’m still processing.”
This quote is why I have worked hard for about 35 years working on ‘my emotional baggage’, as I had a challenging although not totally unhappy childhood and have had many difficult adult experiences as well. We need to deal with our own ‘shit’ especially so that we do not pass our own baggage on to our own children, but also so we stop the pattern of hurting others.
There a few other interesting reads about narcissists on Quora (I’ve added two links below), but from my perspective, the only thing to do when they ‘attack’ you is to BLOCK them in every corner of your life. I recently did that to three in my life, and have since been bombarded by friendship requests from ‘their friends’. I guess the only way of trying to keep in touch with me, or to control me. One instance was 12 requests in about 12 hours, so it was more than obvious this particular narcissist, who has attempted to destroy my life twice before the more recent incident, I have also watched her destroying others lives as well. It is sickening to watch, and to deal with, and once a narcissist, always one; it seems there is no cure…
The one thing they really lack is kindness, although they start out their relationship with you as if they are really loving and thoughtful; it is a very painful lesson to learn when you’ve become close friends with one or worse, you have one in the family… The only things for me to have done to survive them, is first to understand them, and then where possible, block them from my life.